Two Out of Three Ain't Bad

Did I mention that any time my above or below neighbors turn on their bathroom fan, we can hear it echoing in our bathroom? I wish I knew who decided to shower in the middle of the night; I would go to their apartment, bra-less and bleary-eyed, and burst inside to humiliate them in their naked state. It sounds like a grainy, whining motor that indeterminately nags at me whenever it's on. And, to show how respect is really won, I have stopped leaving my fan on for longer than needs be. But, apparently the neighbors haven't gotten the message.

I've been thinking a lot about how I have been told that I go from one extreme to another. I believe that it would be more accurately put that I change my mind a lot, but with determination. I'm not much of a wishy-washy flip flop; if something is going to be believed, it may as well be full throttle. But, there are a lot of things to be believed, about myself and the world around me. So, with all the new information coming in every second, my former thought gives way to new ideas and new beliefs. And there lies the mysticism of my black and white lifestyle-I am always collecting the latest. And I want to conform to the latest, in my own way. I love the old parts, but I'm fascinated by the newest updates, especially by the ones that swing my way. All in all, though, I'm still the same me, no matter what I believe at any given moment.

Tonight, I said that I wanted to sleep the day away so it'd be tomorrow. And then, later, I said I wanted to stay up all night. How do people deal with those kinds of shenanigans from me? I'm exhausted, but I know I won't be able to sleep. I hope Caleb can sleep, though. It would make my life easier to know that I'm not causing him to have a restless night.

I've also been thinking about what it would be like to follow every whim one ever had. First off, that would be terribly draining. Secondly, it would be enthralling to see where your mind would take you. And lastly, it would be completely freeing. One can become a slave to anything, except oneself. When you're following all of your own orders, I wonder if it would lead to heaven or to hell.

Late night thoughts. Excuse me for them.

Forget about all of this. I hope you didn't even make it this far.