100

President Hinckley died today. He has been the president of our church and prophet of the world for most of my remembered life. And now he is with his sweet wife; I hope someday to know such a happy reunion.

This is my 100th post. I have been saving it for something very special.

This is quite special, indeed.

Don't Care How

Sometimes, people say not to look a gift horse in the mouth. Though I know the origins of this old cliche, I sometimes find it hard to follow its kooky advice.

There are so many great and quality things that I've recently been blessed with. I just scored the best job ever and school is going well; these two things particularly have been bona fide miracles, as their timings have been testaments to me that I don't always know what's best for me. I've found that my life is following this lilting tune that gives me the high notes at the perfect time and the flowing chorus when I need a little break. I finally saw all of High School Musical 2 and the entire trilogy of the "Bourne" series. Even the frigid Utah temperatures aren't really bringing the old girl down.

And is my wont, I am still wanting more.

As I alluded to in my previous post, we finally got the maternity insurance that I've been waiting for. I have had the knowledge of how babies are made, but I didn't realize that when I got into the actual game that it'd be a crap shoot. We are literally in the Flanagan Casino and I am daily showing my whole hand as I push all my chips into the center of the table. And because there isn't a light that goes on when conception happens, I am coming back to the neon slots every morning with the hopes that today will be the day.

I just keep thinking that I'll be stalwart.

For those who have seen the Holly Throughout The Ages show, it shouldn't be a surprise when I say that the real story is that I am impatient. My mind is locked in to the sound of buzzing thoughts that are barely audible and I expect the world to stop while I am Getting This Done.

There isn't anything I want more. Why I am not currently visiting the ladies' room 20 times a day is beyond me. When will I be complaining about my back and crying over the three-legged lamb? I have never desired to be so ill and cranky and glowing in my whole life.


How very Veruca Salt of me.

Rock Me Gently

The end of a crazy good week, y'all. School has been treating me like a champ (a smart champ, at that!) and I am liking work as much as ever. Caleb is just a dream and now we're covered for a huge exciting change! Life is so, so, so good.

(Nice to Meet You) Anyway

Hello, First Day Of School.

While others are moaning about your return and even more are feeling the doubts of your familiar presence, I am trying to feign comfort. There are many things about you that are foreign to me.

I feel as if I am going to be a fake walking around Real Students. I know that I'll slip up and say something outrageous sometime today. And the worst part is that I'll be blind for awhile, seeing as I can't see a) without glasses and b) with the glasses I currently have.

You're scary, not just intimidating or daunting. You're terribly frightening and I hope that I will soon have other distractions that help me veer away from focusing on how petrified I am to wake up every morning from now on.

At least all of the new mornings won't be Firsts anymore.

We Never Learn, Do We

My body does strange things sometimes. Be it the occasional eye twitch or joint cracking, my body is just reliable that way. Therefore, I was not afraid during my bath this evening when I felt like my heart was beating from inside my abdominal area. But it got me to thinking, if there really is a heart beating in my stomach, I had better get out of the bath before I boil it. So, I drained the water and let my tummy stop beating.

I'm doing much better now.

********

I was asleep by 11 last night. I didn't ring in the New Year, but I do feel thoroughly cleansed from last year; it was messy and grungy. Now I feel at peace and like everything is coming together. And with that, I'll say that my fancy bath bomb I got for Christmas is totally the bomb.